april showers bring may flowers??

this spring has been a late bloomer here in utah.

usually by this time of year, we are breaking out those shorts, putting on that sunscreen, and grabbing our swimsuits.

however, this year has been on the chilly side.

with plenty of rain showers and hailstorms.

as many of you know,

i am not a fan of the cold.

and this weather has been... not my friend.

but

after having all of these rainstorms, the rain got me thinking about something.

sometimes in life we feel like it rains

and other times we feel like it pours.

there are times we feel like we have a big dark cloud over us

pounding on us

and

weighing us down.

but there's something so beautiful about the rain.

because after it rains,

the grass gets greener.

the flowers start to bloom.

the sun comes out peepin'

and we see a rainbow.

i went on a hike the other day (on the first warm-ish day in WEEKS)

and i was in awe at how green everything was.

the mountain was full of greenery instead of dry, dull, yellow grasses.

there's a quote i love that says,

"the sun will rise and we will try again"

.

.

.

i love that quote so much because no matter how bad a day gets or how bad a "storm" in our life is for that matter...

there's always tomorrow.

and the rain won't last forever.

but because of that rain,

we can become something more.

if we let the rain help us grow instead of water us down and wash us out.

april showers really do bring may flowers.

even if it's more like a may rain and a june bloom.

xoxo // kenzie kaye

madewell daisy sweater // blush  corduroy hat (similar see here) // hollister jean leggings 

chasing light

the past few months i have been struggling with knowing WHAT I SHOULD DO NEXT.

i found that i was all of a sudden in this weird limbo stage where i wasn't going to school yet and i couldn't really get a job back at my parents' house for only two months before i move out.

so do i move?

do i stay?

do i get a job?

do i continue what i'm doing?

do i stop all of that and go a different direction?

what should i do???

and... to add to that... it was CRUNCH TIME.

I HAD A TIME LIMIT TO FIGURE ALL THIS OUT.

CRAZY RIGHT??? 

#NotHelping.

if you remember my blog post a few weeks ago, 

i talked about making decisions.

which is easier said than done.

because the one thing i really rely on when making decisions wasn't working.

i was praying and i felt SO confused as to what i should do.

one second i felt like i was getting one answer and the next i was getting something else.

AND THEN

i would read my scriptures and it was like i was getting one answer and then i would read the next part and it was like something else!

I WAS LIKE 

"COME ON HEAVENLY FATHER YOU NEED TO BE CLEAR WITH ME HERE. 

I NEED YOUR HELP!"

and for a long time it seemed to be going this way.

i felt like the heavens were either closed or that they were messing with my brain and i had no idea what to do.

the time kept going by.

i continued just living my life and praying about things.

and i just decided to trust the process.

i started to wonder if i missed my shot.

if i was too late.

if i was doing the wrong thing.

because technically, if things would have gone to MY plan...

i would be moved out by may 1st. i would have a job. i would know what i'm doing. i would have all of the ducks in a row and things would be perfect.

but now it's the middle of may!

and i'm technically "16 days late" to have made a decision according to MY "time limit"

however. everything is coming into place.

things are working out.

and what i've done the past few weeks, going to interviews, spending time with family and friends up north, has been exactly what i needed.

i didn't need to rush.

heavenly father has the perfect timing.

there's no need for us to chase the light. but to let the light fall upon us.

because golden hour will always be at the right moment we need it.

and heavenly father knows that.

so we need to trust him.

and trust in his timing.

heaven doesn't exactly work at the same speed we do here on earth.

sometimes we are going to have to put our faith in the process and let it run it's course. 

my family and i have fasted and prayed for many things the past few months and i'm amazed at how everything works out in the end. even though we may be spending time worrying or stressing about something, heavenly father always comes in clutch at the moment we need him most.

the homework assignment that is due that day but the link isn't working,

gets fixed and the class is passed with an A.

the job i thought i lost,

called me back and i got the job!

the house i wanted to rent and move into may 1st,

isn't ready until a few weeks into may anyway.

mothers day watercolors went SO WELL,

it was SO NICE to be home in west point to hand-deliver them to most of the customers instead of having to mail them and have it be more expensive.

.

.

.

so even though i thought my life was falling apart and i had no idea what to do,

the one person who always knows, 

knew just when things would fall into place.

and it all worked out in the end.

like it always does.

and for that, heavenly father, i'm super grateful.

thank you.

thank you for your light in my life. 

(even when i try to force the light into my life and get too carried away... i'm still grateful)

xoxo // kenzie kaye 

striped button down dress // hope ave // gigi pip hat // similar see here or here // tassel earrings // similar see here  // pink heels // similar see here 

dancin' 2 ma own beat

as much as i love social media... sometimes it can seriously attack your soul.

it's soooo easy to complain, criticize, or compare yourself, your feed, your pictures to others if you aren't careful. 

have you fallen for the trap??

i have!

but social media isn't always bad.

it can be an AMAZING source of inspiration, business, and creative flow. 

i love the GOOD aspects of social media.

and 

i have to be careful not to get sucked into the BAD aspects of it.

because that's how satan gets ya! 

(and we already know, none of us need any of that)

SOCIAL MEDIA = CREATING CONNECTIONS

i honestly love connecting with people through social media.

i have made so many friends that i never would have met before!

i now i have friends all over the world and in surrounding states that i have met through blogging and photography and whenever we are in the area, we get in touch. and i think that is SO fun.

some of my favorite memories of blogging has been doing collaborations with photographers and companies. i have loved working with them and getting to know them!

there are sooo many ways we can connect. 

there are always meet & greets going on.

giveaways and classes to win.

and simply just liking and commenting and sharing their work with your friends as well.

JUST

BEING THERE SUPPORTING THEM

is a great way to connect with people and begin to build that connection.

building connections is a wonderful way to reach out and broaden your horizons, make new friends!

SOCIAL MEDIA = LETS GET DOWN TO BUSINESS... BUSINESSES.

like i said, the business side of social media is WAY nice.

you can reach a much wider demographic because of social media and the internet.

i follow many boutiques and small businesses on my blog and i love to support them!

because i know that stuff is not easy to do. 

and helping get the word out about businesses that you love is a great way to use social media for good.

even blogging is a business.

crazy right???

there are girls who have blogging as their main source of income. 

it's literally their full-time job.

and there's a lot of work that one needs to put in for that to happen!

(haha maybe one day i'll be able to get there)

but i think it's amazing to see/get to know so many businesses and people who are trying to achieve their dreams and be able to help them along the way.

it's way nice to be able to get your product/vision out to more people all over the world.

(that was not a thing over 100 years ago) 

SOCIAL MEDIA = LET THAT CREATIVITY FLOW

guys, i LOVE this aspect of social media.

i'm the type of person who has to see/hear something in order to get the ideas flowing.

that's why i love social media.

one of my handy dandy favorite apps,  PINTEREST , helps me with just that thing!

i love to get on and receive my own inspiration and vision for future posts to create.

there are so many DIY projects i have found because of social media and pinterest too. many hobbies i never would have known that i would be into if it wasn't for the ideas from other people who shared it on their social media.

i love piecing together vibes and colors and ideas from multiple things and making it my own in my own creative way.

and i love that other people can do that too.

inspiration can be a hard thing to come by sometimes and creative block is REAL.

but i love how social media has so many ways that we can get around that feeling of being stuck and be able to receive a new boost of creativity. 

so even though, social media is good to use to help other people/coexist & create in this creative world,

you can't complain, criticize, or compare YOUR social media to others.

you have to be you.

so that's why i'm dancin' 2 ma own beat.

i'm going to post things that make me happy.

because it's not someone else's feed, it's mine. and it's my story.

and sometimes no, it's not going to be "perfect" but it's going to be me.

my life is not perfect.

my life can get messy.

and that's okay.

because life is not meant to be one color.

it's supposed to have it's lights and darks and brights and dull colors.

that's what makes it beautiful.

i love living in a world with so many creative people doing so many amazing wonderful things. 

i'm going to channel that energy into creating my own thing.

instead of letting it drag me down and chain me to the ground.

so. 

who's ready to create something???

FOR YOU.

xoxo // kenzie kaye

vici collection sweater // hollister jean leggings // white high top converse, similar see here // suede baseball cap, similar see here // earrings (target), similar see here

how do i decide?

on a mission, so much is decided for you. 

then you come home.

and then you get hammered with the question.

"SO.... NOW WHAT???" "WHAT'RE YOUR PLANS??" "WHAT'RE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE??"

on a mission you just know that everyday you are going to be doing the same routine. 

and then all of a sudden, you don't have that same structure or schedule anymore.

and all of a sudden, you have to start thinking about your future.

the past couple of weeks i have been considering a couple of things.

because i already knew i was going to school in the fall. 

but that left me the rest of the spring and the entire summer to fill.

so, how do i decide??

who actually likes making decisions?

i, for one, do not.

haha i'm the worst at making decisions!!!

i am the type of person who narrows it down to two of the better options and CAN'T DECIDE.

i can never make up my mind!

as my head is spinning round with the if's, and's, but's... 

i simply have the hardest time!!!

SO.

WHAT DO YOU DO TO DECIDE???

WHAT HELPS YOU???

here's a few things that help me!

so my hardest thing is something about myself that is a blessing but also a curse.

I AM SUCH AN EASY-GOING INDIVIDUAL.

like you know the part in "the notebook" where they're fighting and ryan gosling is like "WHAT DO YOU WANT???" and then rachel mcadams is like, "IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE." and he's like "WHAT DO YOU WANT??"

yeah. that's my life.

not because things are not simple but just because

i can see how each option would work. and i know how to make each option work in my mind.

so that also makes it really hard to decide!

and when the options are tied in my mind, i am the type of person who needs outside input.

are any of you the same way???

that's probably my go-to source of decision making.

ASKING OTHERS.

of course, i have my own reasoning and my own research before i go in and ask people what i should do.

( because i do think it's important to have your own opinion and not to just go with what everyone says. )

and i don't just ask the regular joe on the street, i ask those i love. those who know me! those who i look up to and know that they would be putting my best interests in mind.

because i really don't know everything.

and i know that there are people in my life with EXPERIENCE who've been around the tree a few times, and could potentially help me with the bigger picture.

another thing that helps me is

PRAYING ABOUT IT.

prayer has been a life-saver for me in my life.

heavenly father really knows the beginning to the end. 

he knows about my life wayyyy better than i even know about it myself.

he knows who i was before now and he knows who i will be after.

so i trust that he knows what's best for me.

( even though, sometimes that's easier said than done lol. )

but if i'm worried or struggling with something, i just tell god all about it.

i just talk to him, like i would my parents, and i ask him my questions. 

because even though he's not right by my side physically, 

he still answers prayers.

and i want to include god in my decision-making. 

if i can save myself from unnecessary wrong roads and turns, then i'm gonna take it haha.

and one last simple step i like to do 

IS MAKE A LIST.

i make a list of the pros and cons for the things i'm trying to decide between. 

and that helps my mind narrow it down. 

to know which is really the better option for me!

SO.

in review, 

i

talk it out.

pray about it.

think it through.

make a list.

oh and don't forget

to trust your gut.

usually we really know the decision before we even "really decide"

anyways!

those are some things that work for me!

but i wanna know,

WHAT WORKS FOR YOU???

xoxo // kenzie kaye

hope avenue dress // target sunnies // francesca earrings